I am sure that I am not alone in this weird feeling of grief going on right now. The world is changing and the constant "new normal" and "things won't be the same again" is nothing short of terrifying to hear. I think that the fact I am pregnant during this weird time is just making me think "what the actual fuck, how can I be bringing a beautiful, innocent human into this world". And it's scary. So, so, so scary. I have roughly 12 weeks to go give or take. 12 weeks to prepare, 12 weeks to gear up for birth, 12 weeks til I become a Mum of two... And what am I doing that time? The total opposite of what I imagined I would be.
I had these visions of meeting other like minded Mums this year, creating more of a Community, finishing my Sacred Pregnancy course so that I could hold circles for other Mumma's to be, where we could hold each other, talk and fall into the flow that this journey of pregnancy is, getting out more to fun places like the park and the Library with my little one, having play dates and truly working on getting out of my comfort zone to make friends. We also had the intention of having another little 'Baby Celebration' to celebrate that we created life and a Blessingway which I truly believe is so important for mothers.... So yes, I am absolutely gutted at what's going on. We moved to a new town at the beginning of February this year... There were a number of reasons why but I felt an absolute breathe of relief when I realised that I could get out, socialise more and not be so isolated. I had spent so many months with just a toddler, my friends were all working, weekends a majority were partying (or working), my partner was working late, getting home later due to the drive to and from work, my family lived a min. of half an hour away (which does add up) and it really started impacting me closer to the end, closer to the day we moved I knew this is what I needed in order to thrive. We settled in, my family was just up the road, I could go out to places, explore, not be stuck in the car for longer distances... Oh my was it great. Fast forward to now... And I am more isolated than ever.
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A Mum on a mission to raise an Earth Warrior.
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